My life as a mailhouse mystery

There are some things in life that don't happen enough. Fireworks, public humiliation and the closely related public fart. Much like fireworks and public humiliation a good public fart is loud and unexpected. I was at the post office the other day changing my address. It was about 4:30 and the post office was packed. In a line of about 20 people, I was smack dab in the middle of minding my own business. Checking my phone every couple of minutes, looking around at the collectors stamps (who collects stamps, really?) when all of a sudden I hear a long and lean fart. It was a ten seconder at least, sounding identical to a whoppi cushion. I look around to both prove that it was not me and to inquire as to who would commit such a heinous crime. As I looked, all twenty of us starred directly at the culprit, a shorter Indian man with a curry colored shirt. Fortunately for all of us, he was at the front desk with his mail, a good ten feet ahead. I immediately bust out laughing. Being the youngest and now obviously the least mature in the room, I try to maintain composure. A gentleman in front of me says, "that was the loudest fart I've ever heard", "was that for real?" the guy behind him said. The woman behind me started looking around and I too was looking for a hidden camera. What was supposed to be a short in and out experience at our local post office turned into a bonding experience with 20 of our towns residents. We had all just been on a journey. From the minute that Indian man farted, each of us left our keep to myself, I'm on a mission mindset and entered a group effort to make that fart seam unheard and natural.
But it wasn't.